Renew Your Mind, You Are Not Fading/Invisible

Good Day and welcome to the 2^nd edition of keys2unlock 2020. Thank you for hanging with me and being patient! Know that I love you and may you receive of the Lord!

All my life I have seemed to be more concerned with what everyone else thinks about me, not what I thought of myself or what I wanted or what may have been best for me. Always about what others notice about me. As if I am erasing my own self. Attempting to view myself, was like standing in a mirror and I see through my reflection. Who have I become? Strangely enough I thought immediately of the movie Back to the Future. You know the one where Marty McFly looks at a picture of himself and his siblings and they begin to fade as if they are being erased from existence. So, he springs into action to restore what was broken. Mind you he is the one who caused this in the first place. So, I began to really think about somethings. My life, my self-worth or self-esteem has been compromised. I have been compromised by myself. As if I gave myself permission to erase myself. Wait!!! What???

I experienced something in my childhood that may have been the door opener the beginning of Kevin making it ok to slowly erase himself. I won’t get into the story itself because It will be a very long read. But to get to the meat and potatoes of the story I had a group of friends that turned on me for reasons unknown and to say the least I lost them all as my friends which as a young elementary school child that was devastating and very, very difficult to recover from. Here I am some 35 years later learning that this was a moment in my life that I had not recovered from and it was affecting how I viewed myself. Well I had not forgiven them like I should have which I believe would have helped me to shut that door. I realized that I had become a chameleon of sorts. Chameleons are lizards that can change colors to protect themselves or hide. Well that actually isn’t primary reason they change colors. They change colors to reflect their mood or to communicate. So here I am using the chameleon’s style and abilities to hide or blend in (erasing myself) when I could have used the primary ability which is to express myself. This may seem like a crude/odd analogy but I hope you get the point. Yesterday I came to understand that I have been operating in low self-esteem, God was showing me a blockage in the pathway to Him. I have been trying to pinpoint this thing for a long time somewhere between 1-35 years with no answer in sight. Why because I have been trying to do it and figure it out alone. Like I wrote in the intro, I gave myself permission to delete myself. Who am I to say I am not worth anything? Who am I to listen to that? My creator did not create me to erase myself nor did He create me to self-destruct. I have forgotten who I am because I am trying to fix me. I was trying to do God level work as a user. That won’t work ever!!! If you have been keeping up with my blogs you might remember Brokenness. Well let me tell you this, I am not hopeless, lost, stuck, broken, defeated, erased, unlovable, awkward, incompetent, stupid, invisible or anything not ordained or set by God. I declare that you are not any of these either. If you feel like you are, then ask God to RENEW YOUR MIND! Romans 12:2 NKJV “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is good and acceptable and perfect will of God.” NLT version says it this way: “Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.” Allow God to transform you don’t think you can do it all alone. It’s not possible through you but through God all things are possible. Take the next step to renewing your mind and to move in what your purpose is. I encourage you to check out these scriptures. I pray you received something from this blog. I pray you are filled with God’s love, joy, peace, favor anointing and Holy Spirit and share what God is doing in your life. Your experience may help someone else through their experience.

Remember you are important to God! He will never leave you nor forsake you!

Romans 5:3-11, 12:2

Ephesians 1:4-5, 4:24

Deuteronomy 28:13

Isaiah 54:17

Philippians 4:13

Proverbs 31:25

Psalms 28:6-7, 62:5-6

1 Corinthians 15:10

2 Timothy 1:7